Mary of A Day In The Life

The featured blogger this week is Mary of A Day In The Life! Mary is the proud MoM of one year old boy/girl twins, Penny and Ben.

What made you decide to start a blog?

The main reason I started a blog was just to chronicle life our life. I have all these baby books that the first few months are filled out, then nothing. It’s hard to find the time with two infants to get around to things like that. I wanted something to be able to look back at though. I wanted to be able to remember when they got their first teeth, said their first words, took their first steps, and I just find it easier to find time to blog. Plus their is the added bonus of far away friends and family getting to watch them grow up. Now I really enjoy blogging and the community it has provided. There is now twin moms group here, so this blog has introduced me to people who know what I’m going through.

How did you and your husband react to the news of twins?

We were in for an appointment at 11 weeks and they were trying to find the heart beat. They ended up bring in a small portable sonogram machine, then very nonchalantly said “You’re having twins.” I was just shocked. I didn’t really say anything, my mind was spinning. My husband jumped up and asked for a second opinion, but sure enough there were two little beans wiggling around. It took us sometime to wrap our heads around it. I went back and forth from joy and terror. There are no twins in my family and it was quite a shock. Some days I still can’t believe I have twins.

Why did you choose cloth diapers, and what tips or advice do you have for families considering the same?

My husband is currently getting his PhD and I had to quit my job as a preschool teacher to stay home with the babies, so we were looking for anyway to save money. Cloth diapers have saved us so much money! We got a bunch of disposable diapers as gift and we use tho

se for traveling and over night. Even with that we have never had to buy diapers. The initial investment can seem daunting, but it pays for itself quickly, especially with two. They are actually really easy to use and are so cute these days! And of course, it does cut down on our waste. Those are the reasons we are using cloth.

Cloth diapering sounds like it is a lot of work and gross, and years ago it was. The technology has come so far. There are a couple extra loads of laundry, but that’s really it. I say if you are just starting try pocket diapers. They go one just like normal diapers. You just wash them, then dry the liner and hang dry the shell, easy! Plus they make the babies tushies look adorable! Also I would invest in a diaper sprayer. It hooks right on to the back of your toilet and sprays off any thing that may be sticking on, then you just flush it right down. I actually enjoy using cloth diapers. That may sound weird… Ok, I don’t enjoy the poop part, but I do enjoy saving money and knowing I am being eco-friendly… and did I mention the cute baby tushies?

How did you handle the transition into twin mamahood?

You would think going from a job where I took care of 16 two year olds to just two babies would have been easier… WRONG! Back in the collicky infant days staying home with them, there were days I longed for those 16 two year olds instead of being home alone with the two screaming babies I had. I know that sounds awful, but it is a rough transition. Some people make the transition look easy, and I just don’t believe them anymore. It does get much easier, but those first few months can be really rocky. Twins come with a steap learning curve, you just gotta dive in and kiss sleep good bye.

What would be your advice to a new MoM or Dad?

I got lots of advice when I was pregnant. Everyone just heaps the wisdom on when you are pregnant. There were two pieces of advice that I got that I will definitely pass on though. First, get those babies on a schedule. This is so important to your sanity. Getting them to sleep at the same time gives you time to sleep or wash bottle or just watch some tv. I think that getting them on a schedule also makes them happier too. Also, keep your expectations low. Their will be days you won’t get dressed, will have baby puke down your back, your house will be a mess and the delivery man will call you by name. It’s ok. It’s only for a little bit. Don’t stress yourself out trying to get everything done. Those baby cuddles won’t last forever. So get done what you have to and try not to stress out about the rest.

What questions do you have for the other families in the community?

My babies are almost a year. Wow, it’s amazing the difference a year can make! Penny is walking and into everything, and Ben is close to walking and into everything. The problem I am having with them right now is trying to get them to be gentle with each other. Here is the scenario that happens at least 10 times a day at my house. Ben finds Penny’s toy more interesting than his. He takes the toy from Penny. Penny gets mad. Penny bites Ben. Poor Ben is covered in bite marks, but I can’t always get their fast enough. And why does he ALWAYS have to take her stuff anyway? They are only a year, so they don’t really understand sharing or being gentle. I really do need to figure out what do do about the biting though. There has been blood multiple times.

So my question is for parents out there who have dealt with something similar. What did you do? I feel like they might be too young for discipline, but saying “ouch, no no no!” and redirection is not cutting it. Anyone have and tips or advice to help me out with this situation?

Be sure to leave your answer to Mary’s question in the comment section and then head over to A Day in the Life to leave some bloggy love!

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  1. I love your question! My twin boys will be 1 in two weeks and they are just so rough with each other. We have tried the same thing, telling them no, redirecting them and moving them across the room from their brother, but nothing seems to do the trick. They seem to always be hitting, biting, taking toys away or tackling each other. I have no idea what to do! I’m so glad mine aren’t the only ones that do this though. It sounds like we both have babies who are acting normally! Be reassured that you’re not alone with this problem. Good luck and your little ones are adorable!

  2. We went through two biting phases with our G/G twins, now 3 1/2. One was maybe around the year / 15-18 month time frame, and the other was maybe at 2 1/2. When the girls were younger, I did the things you mentioned. I would also cuddle the child who was bitten. I always felt a little bad about that…like I was putting on a “display” of affection to Baby A, and “shunning” Baby B, but it seemed to help underscore the point.

    We also used sign language with the girls. I would sign “share” to them so often (and I still do!). I felt like saying the word, and physically illustrating it via sign, helped to reinforce my point. Especially in the heat of the moment, I think it helps to communicate in a couple of different ways. Additionally, I signed “gentle”. I sometimes will pause the girls mid-action and ask them, “Show Mommy what ‘gentle’ is.” I’ll have them “pet” my hand. I think it helps redirect them and causes them to really stop and think for a moment what I’m asking.

    Finally, during both of the phases we went through, our pediatrician stressed that that was a normal phase…it will pass.

    Best of luck! And I appreciate your honesty about the first few months being HARD. It’s not always said, but I found it true for me. I just shared with a fellow MoM, though, that at about 18 months, it truly started to get “fun”…and it’s just been getting more so ever since. Enjoy the ride!
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  3. Not true at all. They actually have more understanding of sharing than singles. They come into the world having to share you and your attention. The share a space and toys. Timing out for the behavior works at 1. They understand they dont want to be in bed when their sibling is playing. It has worked for us. I also do a lot of talking. Repeating the same sentences. If you do that then you cannot play and then they are removed. My boys are almost 2 and it has worked out. I have also had to try the drop of vinegar. I found that on the net! Pulling them away from the area and explaining if you do that ‘behavior’ you will get medicine. Only for extreme behavior do i use…spitting, biting, and screaming. It has started to work. Believe it or not. Your children know what they are taught. Teach them and watch them grow! Good luck!

  4. It’s totally normal. I had/have one biter and one hitter. We just take the tack of saying “no” and moving them away from each other. The wounded baby gets the toy and cuddles, too. I’ve also started buying 2 of the popular toys.
    As for sharing, I think twins do a much better job than singletons. My oldest (singleton) is 4 and still struggles with it, but the twins know they need to wait their turn. They still fight over toys, but the hitting and biting have stopped for the most part. They’re 18 months and the less-verbal child will yell “Share!” when she wants something, so it’s not perfect yet.
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  5. Colleen Hollingsworth

    Hello, I am a mother of 20 months old boy girl twins, I have a great appreciation for mothers of multiples. This is why I feel obligated to inform you that a girl on my facebook has stolen your pictures of your kids to pass them off as her own. A quick google search of one year old b/g twins led me to the pictures of “her kids” which of course are actually yours. Her name is Sara Naquik. She claims her children’s name’s are Shaylnn and Peyton. I have a “screen shot” of her page before she blocked me for calling her out on it, but have no way of attaching it here. If you would like to give me your email I will send it to you. I know that I would want someone to tell me if a crazy person created a fake life around my precious children. All the best

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