Today we have a lovely interview from a Triplet blogger, David and Monét Payne from http://3paynesinapod.com/. Their triplets were born at30 weeks and are now 8 months old! Follow them on Facebook here.
Why did you start your blog?
My wife and I initially started our blog as a way to keep our families up to date on our pregnancy and how it was progressing. As we moved forward, we discovered that there were not many blogs that addressed a his and hers perspective on the impact of infertility and a multiples pregnancy. So the idea was born to share our story with the world. We have since gained tremendous support and love for our family and our triplets.
Were you surprised to discover you were having Quads?
Very much so! So much so, that I turned red and couldn’t utter a word, and my wife laughed! Lol. In all honesty, we knew there was a possibility that we could have multiples. As using any fertility drug has that risk. Yet, we also knew there was a small chance of that happening. We were definitely taken by surprise. And yes 4 shocked us 4 times over. When we left the doctors office that day, we were very quiet and still in great shock. We walked to the car, hand in hand, drove to a secluded parking lot, and my wife began to cry. We called our families to share the amazing news. It was all extremely surreal. We prayed for a huge blessing and never imagined it times 4. We both go into much greater detail in the blog “Click” and “Wait a minute, how many did you say?”
How did you discover you were having Quads?
My wife was due to take a hcg test, and the fertility doctors office would call us with the news of our pregnancy. They stated her hcg results were quite high in number, which could indicate multiples, but more than likely indicated a female. They scheduled an appointment to confirm the pregnancy and we came in a week or two later. The doctor checked her and became eerily quiet. The doctor turned up the lights and shared the amazing news. He also was beet red. Learning you’re expecting quadruplets isn’t exactly something you scream from a mountain top. So the doctor suggested we wait before sharing our news. We lost the 4th baby sometime within the next month.
How did you Announce to your families and friends you were having Triplets?
After learning we lost the 4th baby, we decided to keep our news contained to just our very immediate family and closest friends. Carrying multiples is very high risk, and of course we were at risk of losing another. We leaned on our faith, continued to pray, and began treatment with a high risk specialist. We later announced our pregnancy to our extended family and friends on a case by case basis and then on my birthday. Which by then, we were 24 weeks along. At that point Monet was on a modified bedrest, and getting out to a maternity photoshoot just wasn’t an option. So we decided to have a little photoshoot of our own, using some of our own props, our camera and including our dog, Lebron. We also decided on my birthday to launch the blog, so we shared our maternity photos announcing the pregnancy and added a bonus of announcing our blog to the world. We received such a great response.
What was the pregnancy like?
Our pregnancy was both amazing and stressful. It was surreal to finally experience what my friends and family all had gone through, but at the same time it was nerve-wracking, because it was actually happening to us, and because of what we went through losing the fourth baby. It was a constant balance of faith, patience, trust and excitement.
What is the best advice for new parents of multiples?
Read all the information they can get their hands on to educate themselves. Reach out to support groups and other groups for parents of multiples for support. Some advice our cousin gave us that helped tremendously, quite frankly, do not get overwhelmed when people make comments about how difficult it is or will be. They’re speaking from the perspective of having no children or one child. Regardless of how many multiples you do have, you will learn to manage and balance your family needs for that number. For parents of twins, raising twins and caring for your twins is all that you will know. Parents of triplets, while sometimes pushed to their wits end, will only know what it’s like to thrive as parents of 3… and so on. Your experience will be unique to you and your family, regardless of how people on the outside struggle to understand.
Learn to be flexible. Your needs, the needs of your children, and the needs of your spouse will change. Sometimes without warning. Remain flexible and open to adjust your strategies where needed.
David and Monét Payne
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