Featured Blogger: Emily of Double Dootie: The Real Poop on Twin Motherhood

The featured blogger this week is Emily of Double Dootie: The Real Poop on Twin Motherhood. Emily is the proud MoM of 20 month old twins, Finn and Belle. She’s also an independent wine consultant (hollar!). I hope you love this blog as much as I do!

Twin girls Multiiples and More

What got you into blogging?

I thought it would be a great way to become instantly rich and famous . . . kidding. Actually, a close friend suggested I start a blog to chronicle my fertility struggles. She sent me a blog by one of her friends who was experiencing similar fertility issues. After reading that blog, and mulling it over with my hubby, we decided ‘why not?’.

Best. Decision. Ever. Our blog became a wonderful place to document and express all our ideas and concerns about beginning the IVF process. It also became a wonderful way to stay ‘connected’ with all our family, both in the US and overseas. Not to mention, it solidified my suspicions that the only way I could ever become a paid English teacher was if I began teaching English as a second language–in a country that held little regard for accurate grammar and punctuation.

How did you react to the news of twins?

Darn right, there better be two in there! I paid good money for that privilege!! Actually, because we did IVF it was a strong possibility from the beginning. I often tell myself ‘if only you knew then what you know now’; but honestly, how could you ever wish for anything less than two perfect, wonderful, beautiful, children who enjoy stealing each other’s toys and fighting amongst themselves for no good reason?

Initially, I was extremely nervous and bewildered. My husband was ecstatic, he’s an identical twin and said it was the best thing about him ( . . . and my heart melts all over again). Without his confidence and enthusiasm, I’m not sure how I would have felt.

How was your pregnancy?

I waddled like a duck, felt like a barge and couldn’t sleep comfortably for the last 3 months–but other than that, I’ve no complaints. Actually, my pregnancy was fairly uneventful. I carried the twins to 38 weeks and probably could have gone longer; but my medical team was more comfortable with a scheduled c-section and by 38 weeks, I began to agree with them.

I developed gestational diabetes and wish that experience on no other woman. Mine was mild enough to control through diet instead of insulin; but I contribute that mostly to the love and support of my family cooking healthy meals, my husband listening to my constant complaints of being hungry and miserable (which has been difficult to maintain sympathy for these past 21 months post pregnancy–but he doesn’t need to know that) and the privilege of quitting my job to stay home and focus on the pregnancy. Incidentally the last option was only made possible by a cosmic shift in time that forced us to move to a new city where it made more sense for me not to look for a new job.

What is your biggest tip for surviving the first year?

Good question, and if I knew the answer I most likely would be shopping around for book endorsements and other windfall opportunities. For me, the best tip was asking for and using as much help as I could get. We were in no financial position to hire a night nanny or mother’s helper but many of my twin mom friends encouraged finding the money in our budget for this. While it sounds like an indulgence; for a twin mother during the first 3 months it was a primal necessity so my husband could get a good night’s sleep to drive the 40 miles to work everyday; and I could manage the emotional, physical and psychological strain of meeting two newborns’ needs. I had a college student come to the house twice a week for 3 hours. It wasn’t much; but it was my keystone.

What has been your favorite memory with your kids so far?

Surly you meant ‘memories’; there can’t be just ONE! The first week we brought them home was magical. My husband took vacation and we spent the week getting to know the babies. I remember staring for hours on end at each baby trying to memorize their features and get to know them. A close second would be the first time they said ‘Mommy’, learned to walk and gave me kisses and hugs. I could go on and on–but enough about me . . .

What are some of your favorite family activities?

We LOVE Friday night family time and ‘Only Child’ day. Friday evenings are awesome. We order a pizza or hit a local diner for dinner and then come home to snuggle in Mommy & Daddy’s bed for some playtime. We’ll play peek-a-boo, read stories or watch a little TV or movie. Right now, for some inexplicable reason the twins enjoy ‘pretending to sleep’ in our bed. . . secretly, this is our favorite game!!!

‘Only Child’ day is where my husband and I each take one child out for a little morning activity on the weekends. Usually, we’ll take them to separate parks, run errands, meet friends for brunch, etc. Generally, whatever we feel will give us some quality time alone with one of them. Everyone is consistently excited to meet back up and ‘reunite’!! We don’t do this every weekend, but when we can.

What question do you have for other families in our community?

Sharing toys and taking turns are a really big challenge in our house right now. I’d love to know what everyone else is doing to navigate this minefield of explosive emotions. Are you all enforcing sharing, buying two of everything, etc.?

Be sure to stop by Double Dootie: The Real Poop on Twin Motherhood and leave some bloggy love!
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7 comments

  1. It's nice to meet you! Your children are beautiful.

    I have a three year old and 10 month old twins, and sharing is the biggest battle I face every day. Buying 2 of everything doesn't help me that much, because my son will try to steal one. When there are plenty of an item, like legos or blocks, they still steal right out of each others hands!

    My post today is about a toy that causes arguments, and how I got rid of it so I wouldn't have to put out fights all day every day! 🙂

  2. Double the Giggles

    Well, we have two of a lot of things, but your twins will get to a point where even though there is another identical item to play with, they will only want the one in their sibling's hand. When this happens in our home with our 20 month old twin boys, I offer another fun toy. If no one wants it and the whining and fighting prevails, Mommy takes the toy and puts it somewhere and no one gets to play with it. Maybe it's not the best way to teach sharing, but each child is forced to make the best out of something else from the ocean of toys on the floor. When sharing does occur, we praise like crazy!!

  3. I have a 5 year old daughter and (almost) 4 year old twin sons. We use timers for everything! "Just two minutes" is a big deal in our house.
    Mom: It's bedtime!
    Kids: Can I have just two minutes?

    Works for sharing too. One kid gets the item for two minutes, DING, and then the next kid gets the item, etc. (Usually it doesn't matter how long the second kids gets it because the timer has defused the situation.)

    Good luck!

  4. You have a beautiful family!

    I do the same thing 'double the giggles' does. If they cannot share, I take it away. Within a couple minutes, they are onto something else. Yet, it doesn't make the fit throwing or whining any easier! lol.

    I might try the timer method, thanks Rebecca!

    (I am chuckling to myself because you asked the question, and I seem to be reaping the benefit! Good question!

  5. Setting a timer works for us, too! I use a timer to take turns at home and in my classroom.

    *****
    April is Autism Awareness Month. I'm dedicating my blog all month long to Autism.

  6. Thanks everyone! I love the advice; it's always comforting to know you're not alone when it comes to the challenges of parenting.

  7. It is comforting to know that other moms with twins are dealing with the sharing issues. Although they have also been hitting on another, ugh. They are 15 months, I just tell them firmly no hitting! But it must be hard at that age to always have to share toys, but at least they will be a pro in a few years! Well I hope so any ways :0)

    Patty
    http://momsponge.blogspot.com/

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